The Cuphat Show

 Alright, buckle up, folks. We’re diving headfirst into an age-old debate that makes zero sense but somehow lives rent-free in everyone's head: Should teachers earn more than actors? Spoiler alert: YES. Obviously. But let’s unpack this with the chaotic energy it deserves, shall we? The Uncanny Comparison: Why Are We Even Debating This? Who decided this was a fair comparison? It’s like asking, "Who’s more important, the person who teaches your kid math or the person who pretends to be a superhero on screen?" I love a good masala flick as much as the next guy, but no Bollywood star ever taught me how to do long division or helped me decipher Shakespeare. Imagine if teachers got the kind of fanfare actors do. A teacher explains Pythagoras, and the class erupts into cheers like they just watched Salman Khan rip his shirt off. But nope, instead, they get eye-rolls, stress headaches, and salaries that can barely cover a Domino’s pizza party for one. What Do Teachers Actually ...

 Alright, gather around, folks. It’s time we had the talk . No, not the birds and the bees—that’s awkward enough without me involved. I’m talking about the Good Morning Crisis of the 21st Century . Every day, thousands of innocent WhatsApp users are bombarded with a deluge of sunrises, flowers, and motivational quotes that reek of stock photo energy. It’s a problem we need to address… yesterday. "Good Morning": The Most Pointless Two Words Ever Invented Let’s just break it down. The phrase "Good morning" is essentially a verbal check engine light . It’s there, it’s polite, but does it actually serve a purpose? No. We’ve all collectively decided to keep using it out of habit, like hanging onto your uncle’s old VHS collection even though you don’t even own a VHS player anymore. And on WhatsApp? Oh boy. It’s like "Good Morning" has been put on steroids, handed a megaphone, and unleashed into every family group chat. And let’s be real: do we actually feel bet...

 Alright, let’s just cut to the chase: if you’re reading this blog, you’ve already proven something monumental. No, you’re not just awesome—you’re the Olympic gold medalist of being awesome. You’ve unlocked a level of cool that mere mortals can only dream about. The rest of the internet is stuck reading boring stuff like “10 Ways to Fold a Fitted Sheet” or “Why You Should Care About Cabbage,” but you? You’re here. With me. On this exclusive, invite-only ride into a world of awesomeness. Why This Blog Is a Secret IQ Test Reading this blog is like walking into a secret society. But instead of secret handshakes and ominous Latin mottos, the only requirement is being cool enough to find this blog . And let me tell you, if you made it here, you’re part of the chosen few. The elite. The crème de la crème. Think about it: did you see anyone else in the room when you clicked this link? No? That’s because the universe itself whispered to you, “Psst… This blog is for you.” And you listened...

 Alright, buckle up, because I need to rant about something that’s been haunting humanity for centuries. No, it’s not taxes. No, it’s not the guy who chews loudly in the office. I’m talking about writing on rolled-up paper . That’s right, the ancient art of fighting gravity, physics, and your will to live—all while trying to write something coherent on a piece of paper that refuses to cooperate. Rolling Into Madness Who even invented rolled-up paper? Oh sure, it looks classy when a medieval king pulls it out to declare war or some pirate uses it to bury treasure. But have you ever actually tried writing on one of these rebellious scrolls? It’s like trying to tame a wild animal with a pencil. You unroll it, thinking you’ve got this. Then BOOM—like a coiled snake, it snaps back into its tubular prison. Your pen is knocked out of your hand, your desk is a mess, and you’ve written “Dear Sir” over three different layers of parchment. Bravo, you’re now a victim of paper-based combat. Th...

 Let’s talk about the HB pencil—the humble, reliable, "good enough" tool of every classroom, sketchbook, and crossword puzzle. You’ve used it, I’ve used it, and every standardized test in history insists on it. But here’s the thing no one wants to admit: HB pencils are secretly the worst. Specifically, the shine they leave on your paper is a crime against humanity. That silvery glare? That weird, greasy shimmer? Yeah, I’m talking about that . HB pencil shine is like the sparkle vampire of the stationery world: it looks kind of cool for five seconds until you realize it’s ruined everything you love. The HB Pencil: A Betrayal in Your Hand First, let’s start with why the HB pencil even exists. It’s the Goldilocks of pencils: not too hard, not too soft, just mediocre enough to make everyone hate it equally. The graphite is smooth but not too dark, erasable but not too smudgy. It’s like the oatmeal of writing tools—functional, unexciting, and definitely not winning any awards. B...

 Alright, buckle up, folks, because it’s time to talk about the number 7. Yeah, that’s right. The smug little digit sitting there, acting like it’s all that . Seven has somehow convinced the entire world that it’s the Beyoncé of numbers, and honestly? I’m not buying it. How did we let this happen? How did one lonely prime number rise to power and make the rest of the digits its backup dancers? Seven’s Resume Is Unnecessarily Stacked First of all, let’s look at how many ways we’ve let 7 steal the spotlight. There are seven days in a week , seven wonders of the ancient world, seven deadly sins, and even seven colors in a rainbow. Oh, and don’t forget Snow White’s seven dwarfs . It’s like every important list capped off at seven and just called it a day. What happened to 8? Or 9? Did we forget they exist? Why does every cool, mystical, or sacred thing just have to stop at 7? Somewhere out there, the number 6 is crying into its Cheerios, wondering why it wasn’t good enough to make the...

Alright, let’s get real for a second. The living room . What is it? Why is it? Does anyone actually know? Because I’ve been alive for a while now, and I can confidently say the living room has done nothing for me. Nothing. It just sits there, smugly wasting square footage, trying to pretend it’s important. But deep down? We all know the truth. The living room is a fraud. What Does “Living Room” Even Mean? First of all, the name is a scam. Living room . Like this is where we go to live . Buddy, I’ve got news for you: most people do their living in the kitchen (snacking) or the bedroom (Netflix marathons). The living room? It’s where your grandmother’s throw pillows go to die. Oh sure, maybe there’s a couch, maybe a coffee table that never holds coffee, but what’s the purpose here? Nobody knows! It’s a room that just… exists. For what? For vibes ? This isn’t Pinterest, Karen. Vibes don’t pay the mortgage. A Room for No One and Everyone Now let’s talk about who’s actually using the livin...

 Let’s talk about pizza, folks. This glorious circle of cheesy goodness is a staple in almost every culture that’s ever had access to an oven and a dream. Italians? Lunch or dinner. Americans? Breakfast, lunch, dinner, or an emotional support meal at 2 a.m. Indians? Uh… awkward silence . We love pizza—don’t get me wrong. We’ll inhale a slice (or five) without hesitation. But let’s face it: as Indians, we’ve never truly figured out where pizza fits into the grand tapestry of our meals. Is it a snack? A dinner? A food you just order when you don’t know what else to do with your life? The answer is yes. To all of it. Pizza for Breakfast? Who Hurt You? Alright, let’s get one thing straight: in India, breakfast is a sacred institution. It’s poha , idli , aloo paratha , or whatever local magic your region swears by. But pizza? For breakfast? Are you insane? Who wakes up and thinks, “You know what would pair nicely with my morning chai? A greasy slice of pepperoni.” And if you do manage t...

Alright, people, we need to talk. There's a silent war raging in the stationery aisle, and it's time we address the unsung hero in all this madness: Lexi. You know Lexi—the sturdy, no-nonsense pen that’s been silently holding its own for years. Meanwhile, the Cello Gripper is out here hogging all the glory with its fancy ergonomic grip and slick branding, but let’s be real—it’s a fraud. So grab a notebook (not a Cello one), because we’re about to dive into why Lexi deserves the crown and why the Cello Gripper is just a shiny, overhyped poser. --- The Rise of Lexi: Simple Yet Mighty Let’s start with the basics. Lexi is the everyman of pens. It’s cheap, reliable, and doesn’t promise you the world only to ghost you mid-paragraph. You pick up a Lexi, and you know it’ll write smoothly till the bitter end. No ink clogs. No tantrums. Just pure, uninterrupted word flow. It’s the pen equivalent of that one friend who always shows up when you need them—even if you forgot their birthday t...

 Let’s have a little chat, folks. A chat about one of the most obnoxious, overused, underexplained phrases in the entire English language: “thinking out of the box.” You’ve heard it in every office meeting, brainstorming session, and inspirational TED Talk. But what does it actually mean? Is there a literal box? What’s in it? Who put it there? I have questions, people! The Box Is the Problem Here’s the thing: “thinking out of the box” doesn’t mean jack squat unless we first define what’s in the box. Like, am I breaking free of conventional ideas, or am I just rejecting bad ones? Is this box full of useful tools for problem-solving, or is it just leftover office pizza and a stapler? The phrase assumes we all instinctively know what the box represents, but guess what? We don’t. And every time someone tells me to think “out of the box,” I’m left wondering if they even know what they’re talking about. (Spoiler: they probably don’t.) Why the Phrase Is the Verbal Equivalent of a Smug...

 Alright, folks, it’s time to get real about something. A dirty little secret that’s been lurking in the shadows of society for far too long. You know it, I know it, but no one says it out loud: tablets are pointless. Yep, I said it. Oh sure, we’ve all pretended to know what they’re for. We nod along when someone pulls one out at a coffee shop like it’s the holy grail of productivity. But deep down, we’re all asking the same question: Why do these things exist? Are they just big phones? Small laptops? High-tech coasters? Nobody knows. Tablets: The Awkward Middle Child of Technology Tablets are like that weird guy at a party who isn’t really doing anything. Laptops are over in the corner running spreadsheets and coding apps, phones are out there showing off selfies and memes, and tablets? They’re just awkwardly sitting there, holding Netflix . What are we supposed to do with these things? Work? No, because a tablet keyboard is about as reliable as using a flip-flop to write a no...

 Alright, listen up, folks. Today we’re diving into a hard-hitting exposé on the world of kitchenware. Specifically, we’re here to talk about how bowls—the versatile, magnificent multitaskers that they are—get criminally overlooked in favor of plates. Plates! Those flat, one-trick ponies. How did this happen? How did bowls, the super-powered plates of our culinary arsenal, end up as second-class citizens? Well, no more. Let’s give bowls the respect they deserve. Bowls Are Plates with Ambition You know what a plate is? A glorified Frisbee. Sure, it holds your food, but heaven forbid you try to carry soup, cereal, or a hearty bowl of chili on it. Plates are like, “Oh no, liquids? That’s not my department.” Meanwhile, bowls are out here doing it all. Liquids, solids, hybrids—you name it. A plate is a flat surface. A bowl is a plate that decided, “Hey, what if I evolved ? What if I took this flat little circle and gave it some depth ?” Plates are basic. Bowls have range. The Bowl’s Re...

 Have you ever reached for a jar labeled SUGAR and felt a pang of guilt for wanting to fill it with literally anything else? Like, maybe you wanted it to hold your secret stash of gummy worms or spare change? No? Just me? Well, you should, because pre-labeled containers are the silent tyrants of modern life, robbing you of your God-given right to put whatever you want into a jar. Yeah, that’s right. Today we’re coming for you, jars and tins of the world. You may look innocent with your cheery "COFFEE" or "TEA" labels, but you’re nothing more than freedom blockers ! Who Do These Containers Think They Are? Let’s break it down. When you buy a container labeled PICKLES , you’re agreeing to an unspoken contract: this jar will hold pickles, and only pickles. But what if you don’t want it to? What if you want it to hold marbles, or Legos, or your uncle’s questionable coin collection? Suddenly, you’re the bad guy for disrespecting the sacred Pickle Jar Code . It’s like th...

 Ah, the English alphabet: 26 letters working together in perfect harmony to bring us the joy of language. Well… almost perfect harmony. Because sitting right there, smack dab between P and R, is the most pointless, freeloading, waste-of-space letter to ever exist: Q . Seriously, what does Q even do ? It’s like the person in a group project who shows up on presentation day with zero effort but still expects full credit. I’m looking at you, Q. The Cold, Hard Facts About Q Let’s start with the basics: Q cannot function on its own . It’s basically the clingy ex of the alphabet, always dragging U along to do all the heavy lifting. You ever see a Q without a U? No, because it doesn’t know how to survive solo. It’s the alphabet’s version of that one fish that needs a bigger fish to carry it around. Quack? Thanks, U. Queen? U again. Question? U is the real MVP. If Q didn’t have U, it would just be sitting in the corner, mumbling about being misunderstood while the other letters do act...

 Let’s face it, folks: “How are you?” is the most broken piece of societal small talk we’ve ever invented. It’s not even a real question! It’s a scripted exchange, a sad charade where we both know nobody’s telling the truth. If “How are you?” were a movie, it would be Cats (2019) : nobody asked for it, everyone regrets it, and it just keeps happening. It’s time we collectively look this polite monstrosity in the eye, thank it for its service, and let it go—like that ex who was fine but kept asking if you’d seen their band’s latest YouTube video. The Lying Olympics: Every “How Are You?” Ever You know the drill: Them: “How are you?” You: “Good, thanks! How about you?” Them: “Good!” And then you both go your separate ways, fully aware that neither of you is actually “good.” If we were being honest, the conversation would look more like this: Them: “How are you?” You: “Oh, you know, existential dread, bad back, rent due. You?” Them: “Same, but with a side of crippling anxiety!” But w...

 Ah, the assorted box of sweets or chocolates—the ultimate gift for when you care just enough to not care at all. These are the Swiss Army knives of gift-giving: they look fancy, have way too many options, and 90% of the time, you have no idea how to use them properly. But here’s the harsh truth, my friend: no one actually likes these things. They’re traps. Sweet, sugary traps designed to ruin friendships, family gatherings, and your trust in humanity. The Betrayal of Expectations Picture this: it’s your birthday. Someone hands you a beautifully wrapped box of assorted chocolates. You open it, your heart brimming with excitement, only to discover… an almond truffle. Almond. TRUFFLE. It’s the edible equivalent of opening a treasure chest and finding socks. Worse yet, there are three almond truffles. Why do these boxes always double down on the least loved options? Who are the mysterious psychopaths running quality control on these things? The Distribution Scam Let’s break this dow...

 Let me set the scene for you: you're at a fancy café, sipping overpriced coffee, ready to jot down the next big idea that will revolutionize the world. You whip out your notebook, open it with a flourish, and then— gasp —you pull out a blue ink pen . My dear friend, you may as well have whipped out a crayon and started scrawling like a toddler at a Denny’s. Let’s be real here. Black ink pens are not just tools; they’re statements. They’re sleek, professional, and scream, “I’m a person of substance!” Blue ink pens, on the other hand, are like the cargo shorts of the pen world: outdated, confused, and only there because you didn’t know any better. The Psychology of Black Ink Pens Did you know that black ink is scientifically proven* to make you look smarter? (*Science may not agree, but I sure do.) Black ink pens are used in legal documents, official letters, and anything that screams "I’m not messing around." Why? Because black ink doesn’t just say “I care about this”; it...